Society Rant in A-W minor

Anarchists
The other year, what with all the G8 nonsense, a friend came out with a gem of a quote. During the riots - and strange peace conferences go hand in hand with violence - Mick, a self confessed (wannabe) anarchist, moaned of the rioters: "They give anarchy a bad name!" Thattaboy.

Alcoholics
It seems unfair to peg teenagers as the alcoholics of the nation. True, a glaring percentage of underage drinkers do exist in Britain. But then, the most cursory of glances at said statistics - or more easily, a glance down the street - reveals plenty of older role models to look up to in this same regard, parents included.

Antipathies
The problem with the youth today is that they are all too apathetic to live. They don't use their electoral right to vote, ignoring the thousands who fought for that right. Ignoring the fact that Pankhurst and co voted for the right to have the choice(!) to vote, it could be thought that perhaps we see too many similarities in the main parties to care which of the two evils is in power. And lest we forget, politics is hardly the most thrilling subject in the world. Me, I love election night specials and watch them gripped, but can fully understand anyone who falls asleep long before the results are in from Bromley.

Atheists
Lots of people are atheists. Nothing wrong with that. I use to be an atheist before a chance meeting with God scared it out of me. (Said meeting may have been substance-aided, but remained an experience all the same!) Atheism is on the increase in Britain, something that will please Richard Dawkins no end.

Cannibals
"They'll be eating each other next!"
So were the words of one old lady to another, concerning two lovers on a bus I used the other day, and since this is an all-encompassing guide, I now shall attempt to catalogue this most rare specimen of teenager. For the record, I don't personally believe that those two young girls were trying to eat each other. For all I know they may have been, but forgive me if I was a little distracted.

Cats, Curiousity Killed the
People always tell me that curiousity killed the cat. This gets me somewhat worried, since Cat is the name of my little sister (although shes not so little anymore) and she is predominantly a curious fellow.

Chavs
Since when did it become politically incorrect to call a non educated delinquint a "Non Educated Delinquint"? Do we really think that they will be that hurt in the feelings department by being called "non-educated"? It's not about your schooling, folks, its just that educated people, so to speak, do not hang around street corners looking like fashion victims trying to look tough. I guess a Chav is the polar opposite of a Ned: An delinquint, educated and doing its best to forget it.

Communists
It's strange. Being a Communist openly seems to be not such a popular thing nowadays. I guess with the fall of the Berlin Wall its going out of fashion. The trendy folk call themselves Socialists these days. This is meant to differentiate themselves from the more labourious Communist proletariat.

Corruption
The youth today are the corrupters of society. So said one letter to the Daily Record by a contributor who got me so angry I forgot her name. So, no name and shame for you my dear. Only an idiot would call the youth corruptors, for in fact it should be simply obvious to everyone that they are not the corruptors, they are the corruptees: corrupted by the society we live in. So get off your high horse, Disgruntled of Kilmalcolm.

Critics
Anyone can be a critic. Joyce? Rubbish. Horror remakes? Overdone. Roald Dahl? Underrated. See? Even I can critique!

Defamers
Defamation, the art of cultured lying, is a serious thing.

Defendants
The type of person you meet that, when you see their face, you think "that persons going to wind up in frotn of a judge sooner or later."

Depressives
Depression is a terrible thing. A killer of some really talented and loved souls, it is an invisible scourge that strikes indiscrimantly of age, sex or social status. One in four people in Britain will suffer from depression or some other mental health problem, be they panic attacks, schizophrenia, anorexia, OCD or take your pick. Many teenagers have unbelievable stresses put upon them, what with exams, love lifes or the lack of, society and families to juggle, as well as uni and career prospects. It is perhaps unsurprising that many, faced with the world, develop depression. It is only human.
And yet, there is a prevailing attitude that displaying symptoms of depression is a sign of weakness, that such people should merely get a grip. I'm sorry: weakness? Would you call Sir Winston Churchill a weak man? What about Stephen Fry? Charles Dickens? If you are calling the creator of "The Signalman" a craven weak soul, then I shall have to ask you to step outside. They all suffered depression in their lives, and all were far from weak people.
I use to think that if people thought I was depressive, then I would never have anyone to talk to again. This plainly was not true: in fact, quite the opposite, for with it out, friends flocked to support during my times of need.
Robin Williams. Princess Diana. Rosie Kane. Douglas Adams. People with mental health problems are far from stupid, as you can see. Many do not take illicit drugs to facilitate the periods of insanity, myself included. And it can hit anyone. My social scene sometimes reminds me of DNA at Oxford in 1960 at times, with the talent and squandor walking around. Here are people I know and love that I am convinced will go onto become respected actors, writers, activists, politicians, even anthropologists, and so many of them have bonafide depressive spells it is scary. One in four they say. I can well believe it.

Delusionals
I am a delusional. If ever my autobiographu is published it will be done so posthumeously so that people can not possible call me a liar to my face. I frequently see things or remember things that never happened. Great cannon fodder for the fiction career and tall tale, but also makes me somewhat of an unreliable witness.

Dodgers
For the purposes of this debate, I stopped some people in the street in a sort of a Q and A session. Here are the standardised answers.

Q. Teenagers today. In your opinion, are they tax dodgers?
A. Definetly.
Q. What about work dodgers?
A.Yep.
Q Soap dodgers?
A I suppose so.
Q. Draft dodgers? If national service was called back tommorow, would todays teenagers try to dodge the draft?
A. Oh definetly. No sense of conviction.
At this point, the police kindly asked me nicely to step down from the Buchannan Street bench and be quieter, or face the consequences.

Ego
I like to think of myself as a creative genius. Oops, I'm an egotist!

Emo-Child
An emo is someone who tries desperately to be a goth, and fails miserably.

Goths
Goths are hot. This was detailed analysis brought to you by Michael S. Collins

Teetotallers
Teetotal teenagers do exist. One friend once swore he would never touch the demon drink, as it had "made his dad obnoxious".

Werewolfs
Now we're getting a little ludicrous, but not quite nearly enough so...

Worshippers of Satan
Yes, we all indulge in the worship of the beast too, allegedly...

Worshippers of Santa
...except for the dyslexic beast admirers among us.